In the epic, very well, debatably epic story, The Hobbit, there is a character named Gollum.  This character had, in the distant past of the story, discovered a bauble of tremendous mysticism and magical power.  This bauble was in the form of a ring, and with its use, this creature was able to become invisible whilst wearing the item.

However, this enigmatic power bestowed by the donning of the ring came at a price. This ring caused the life of this once humanoid being to become stretched and elongated.  It caused wasting and emaciation of his body.  And this ring created aversions to light and a cave dwelling propensity in this being.  It also pushed Gollum to obsession.  This creature could not be without his “precious.”  This ring being his instrument to invisibility.

Is this the cost of invisibility?  Is this what we pay to disappear?  Can we be sustained by the ability to vaporize?

I need to make reclusive decisions at times.  I must don my shroud of anti-person materials and not venture to the world.  But too much distance causes a yearning, a deep instinctual reaction, that reminds me that I am not a beast.

Like Gollum, I believe that I can, at times, self-sustain via my bauble, or bubble, of cloaking from the outside world.  But unlike Gollum,  distance does not feed, sadness does not sustain, nor do veils offer any warmth.

Thus, given this understanding, and the warmth of a beer in my stomach, I shall review a beer for you.

Gollum – Precious Pils – This strikes me as an attempt to capitalize on a broad marketing opportunity generated by these movies.  I have had similar reactions to the Ommegang beers that have been brewed for Game of Thrones.  Not that I wasn’t skeptical enough by the three-movies-based-on-one-book scenario. The beer is a straw-golden ale which generates a weak head and minimal lacing.  With a pilsener I tend to expect crisp, clean flavor.  Instead I taste a heavy malt backbone and a skunky grain funk.  The smell is a dark-wheat/caramel mash up that isn’t overly pleasant.  Upon further review, this reminds me of a weird malt liquor reminiscent of St. Ides or Old English with a lower ABV feel.   Not so precious. 2/10

Humbly yours,

J